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1. |
Red World
01:24
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2. |
Dog Wearing Heels
02:13
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There's a forest growing on my body
There are clouds moving in and out between my ears
I am beautiful
A product of years and years and years
And it takes so long to cut down every tree
With this stupid little axe that God gave me
So cover me in gasoline
Cover me in
Oh my god, god, I'm so sorry
And I wear these heels with the shame that a dog surely feels
When a dog wears heels
And I wear these heels with the shame that a dog surely feels
When a dog wears heels
My blood is evolving
And it's kicking at my hands
And my hand is a sign
Of my oncoming death
And you are so happy when they're lacking in eyesight
But when you realize their hearing is alright
That feeling fades straight to the dead of night
And I wear these heels with the shame that a dog surely feels
When a dog wears heels
And I wear these heels with the shame that a dog surely feels
When a dog wears heels
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3. |
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A few weeks ago I had a vision
I was bashing my head against the wall
I could see the blood splattering
I could see the chunks fly off
And I thought of my wrists
And the way they could kiss
And leave behind stains on my clean carpet
And I get tense and stiff
And I feel my lips
They're dry as fuck and waiting to be ripped
I live in illusions
Until a cold chill finds my spine
I have been living inside lies
But I kept it all to myself
Not saying don't get help
I'm saying don't brag about how you can tie a fucking noose
Like it's cool
I hate this group
I hate your friends
Cause I'm hearing a lot of shit
That's making me mad
Bragging about how your parents got divorced
Mine did, too
It's not cool, you're not cool
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4. |
Naked
01:31
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I felt sick before I got sick
I got sick and I worsened
I just think my insides found a way out
And it goes take it all in
And you will never get out
Take a deep breath
Cause you will never breathe out
I'm in an actual closet
This dress fits nicely
Turn off the lights and go into hiding
When people come by me
Move to the corner quietly
When people come by me
Move to the corner quietly
And I know when you see me at my lowest, naked
You'll see me at my ugliest, naked
See me at my worst, which is naked
Fake it till you make it
No, fake it till you're breaking
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5. |
Idols
04:26
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She looked atop the hill
She found all her idols
With faces turned away
They opened their mouth
And out came a shockwave
It shook all around
But she felt most of the weight
On the billboards
In the pink air
In the flowers she smells
Hatred
She'll never learn all the secrets
So men will kill her
And women will spit on her grave
Oh, when you will you learn
That you can't compete in this race
Till you let that man unzip your pants
So he can put you in your place
You are so young
But you're not human
You're not people
You're a burden to the world
You'll never not be controversial
She watched as her mother
Cried in the bathroom
Cause her son had died
And it was all her fault
She knows that it's hard on her
She drinks all this wine
Because it couldn't be hardest on anyone but the mother
This fact that she had trouble
Even telling her parents
And her best friends
For years
Must now be stated
Before every conversation
Before she can meet anyone that she might see again
Oh, when you will you learn
That you can't compete in this race
Till you let that man unzip your pants
So he can put you in your place
You are so young
But you're not human
You're not people
You're a burden to the world
You'll never not be controversial
This fact that she had trouble
Even telling her parents
And her best friends
For years
Must now be stated
Before every conversation
Before she can meet anyone that she might see again
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6. |
The Wish Scam
02:49
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Wish upon a star
More like a scam website
Wish upon a star
That I could wear anything I wanted
As long as I had my mind
And the power to take it off in record times
I'd wish upon that star
And I would wait
Someday I hope that giving them my email will give me unknown powers
Someday I hope that genie grants my wish
Someday I hope that I took the right chance
And fell for the right online scam
And I will be the first to get my wish
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7. |
Possible Alcoholic 2
02:18
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Grab your brain and shake it like a
maraca, maraca
Grab your brain and shake it, I won't
won't stop ya, won't stop ya
Grab your brain by the stem and throw it in the waste!
And we'll do a brainless jig
Then we'd say hello without the questions
No more asking if that was serious
Just shake it up, till you feel mindless
Let control go,
Let's be spineless
Let be them
And run, don't stop
You're dancing, running till you drop
Your world's on fire
So where is the door?
Don't take my advice
Don't let me be your guide
I'm gonna pursue hope
And end up taking cyanide
It, it was an accident
I, I wanted realer dreams
It was expected, though
It's totally in character for me
I'm talking to myself
To keep myself from laying down
And sleeping while intoxicated
In my vomit every night
I, I wanted realer dreams
I, I wanted nicer things
I, I wanted fun
I disregard what it'll do to me
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8. |
Guitar Kid
02:40
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I've been lying to myself for so long
Pretending I am confident, pretending I am strong
But I'm so weak, I couldn't muster up the strength to wear jeans
But the photoshoot is soon, and I don't want to be seen
So being frozen in the yearbook is the last thing I need
I hope they edit out my acne, and most things about me
Or just scribble out my face, and censor my name
I'll do a pose with a guitar, and try to look like an artist
And if I had the choice, I'd have them make my name "Guitar Kid"
Cause I don't wanna be known or defined by anything but what my art is
But I'm ugly and I'm stupid, making ugly decisions
Like choosing not to lose weight, and choosing to get that little
Serotonin boost, when I eat more food
I think that Matthew will hate this body too
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9. |
Fortune Cookie
02:07
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I'm a fortune cookie
Crack me open and I'll tell you something weird
Somebody you think might die soon will justify your fear
I'll read it out loud for the whole entire room to hear
They'll all look uncomfortable cause deep down they know who it is
Nobody points fingers
They just look the other way
And pretend it never happened
While I read it again
And I read it over and over
In full acceptance of my situation
It's fate
Am I supposed to die?
The stars perfectly align
They form a knife in my hands
And I stab like the stars told me to do
Yes I stab myself through the mouth into
A maze with no escape
Unless the walls give way
To a bullet that says to me "I'm just for you"
As I look to the clouds I want advice
The only thing I get back is cold
That silence I have dreaded my whole life
Truth shows it's face Just to wink
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10. |
Five Foot Box
03:00
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Go on, grab me by the neck
And shake out my loose brains
Grab me by the hair
And rip it all away
Grab me by my teeth until they become straight
Until they become straight
Until they become
I'm not melting out of love
I am melting out of fear
I assure that I am scared
And very much am here
Cause my feet are planted
My head rings atop my shoulders
My sweat runs against me
I feel things I can't get over
Like how you know my name
But never my real name
Like how they know my real name
But I tell them not to say
Cause I will stay in closets until I turn 18
But when I turn 18, will I really be ready?
Or will I be at the register, telling her her change
And she will look around, like what did I just say?
And she will correct herself, making sure I hear
That I am what I'm trying to avoid as I steer
I moved out of my apartment, it was filled with knives
And pictures of guns I wish I had
And now I'm in a new one
It's filled with broken glass
I can see myself in pieces
And it is looking bad
I can't put myself together
And I get cut in the shards
When I see a failure
With nothing in their cards
I look up into the sky
And I don't see my star
I see my heart in the dark
Lit on fire from afar
Go on, grab me by the neck
And shake out my loose brains
Grab me by the hair
And rip it all away
Grab me by my teeth until they become straight
Until they become straight
Until they become
Growing inside my five foot box
I'm 5'5
I'm growing up
And my body will break before I break through the box
And I will die before I finish growing up
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11. |
West Virginia!
01:47
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My stress has distorted my reflection
My acne has distorted my flesh
My fear has taken form
And it's all over my face
And it's ugly and it's red
And when I feel a little bit better
For a little bit of the day
That acne doesn't go away
It waits for the very next day
When my stress eating distorts me
My surroundings contort me
And make me so scared of unfolding
I will never get out of West Virginia
I will die in this body
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12. |
Victims
02:07
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She didn't know her preacher
Had 5 charges on his shelf
How could she have ever known
That he would be let go
And now there's 2 more charges
But he'll be back in months
And he's been on his best behavior
In a few weeks he'll have some fun
They called her a temptress and a slut
Said the clothes she wore was just too much
He didn't know his therapist
Had been to jail before
For the same thing she had done to him
That many times she's done
They used her swimsuit pictures
In the articles they wrote
And they all called him lucky
She got fanmail, tons and tons
The artists drew her touching him
In ways that he forgot
The kids, they all made fun of him
Called him a fag and such
And when they walk
On constructs built by monsters and by cons
The cars driving by slow down and honk
They are being recorded and stalked
And a man holding a door reaches to touch
He's got impulse to act on
Those girls they don't know what they want
They want him more than they want love
He needs to kidnap to save God
His wife wants them knocked out and drugged
He'll give the pictures to his buds
His doctor wants a few more lungs
His mailman wants to have some fun
He'll give their money to his son
He'll melt them down for Thursday's lunch
Veteran friends think he's too nice
They say three times and there's a price
They're gonna forgive him for now
After all he's part of town
Now let's go bowling and drink beer
We couldn't not see you for years
You're the best bowler in the town
You are the best bowler around
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13. |
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I have been leaving the oven on
I have been leaving the plugs unplugged
Leaving cups of water near the sockets
And forks in what I'll microwave
Maybe this is one of those days where I
Don't know if I want to die
But the remains reserved in my mind
And I get home and don't decide
I just sit in my chair and do nothing
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Friend Hell West Virginia
unprofessional pop punk folk rock nonsense
19
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